"Urine"alysis vs. PO'd

"Anger is a tool for change when it challenges us to become more of an expert on the self and less of an expert on others ... If, however, we do not use our anger to define ourselves clearly in every important relationship we are in -- and manage our feelings as they arise -- no one else will assume this responsibility for us." - Harriet Goldner Lerner, The Dance of Anger

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Is it just me or does everyone living with paralysis have urine issues? If it's not the leaky leg or belly bag, clogged catheter, bladder spasms, UTIs, or wheelchair smashed drainage bag it's something else urine related that we all identify with and understand on some level. Is this an obsession, or perhaps a fact of life normal?

Personally, having a suprapubic catheter is a hassle. It feels like having a portable umbilical cord to drag around everywhere. I even refer to it as "my friend". How goofy is that? I worry that I smell like a nursing home or that the drainage bag will come unclamped - which it has on several occasions. I also go to a good bit of trouble keeping the bag concealed from public view.

Then, there's the issue of clothing...anything too tight interferes with drainage and too loose lets the tubing become visible. Maybe it's a time thing. As time goes by, perhaps I won't mind the attachment. It is convenient when out and about. I never have to worry about where the restrooms are or to excuse myself to the ladies room or be careful about how much water I drink.

Self-cathing would definitely require more change in how to manage bladder issues. It would require attention to a more strict schedule, locating restrooms again, maintaining hand dexterity, and, while I could wear dresses again, I would have to figure out access issues. Maybe in due time this will work. Perhaps, one day I can have a leak or accident and not even be concerned that I smell like a toilet.

Why the anger quote from Lerner? I could choose to be continuously angry about the loss of bodily functions, but where would that lead me?... To a life of bitterness and living in the past with things I cannot change. In the meantime, I prefer to continue contemplating my "navels" when meditating - my natural one and my surgically created one - and be appreciative of their existence and function. What would Buddah do?